JoeDitzel

Comedian, Author, Bad Golfer
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Dreaming

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Al: Ah, Peg. You're down here. Damn. Then I was dreaming you ran off with the dwarf down at the bookstore, and I was living in sin with a Playboy centerfold and her eight friends who could speak but chose not to.

- Married With Children

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    Wasted Mulligan

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    URL: http://www.wastedmulligan.com
    Updated: 10 min 58 sec ago

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:40pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Stuart Appleby lines up a birdie putt on the 6th hole during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:40pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Robert Allenby hits a chip shot to the 7th green during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:39pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Stuart Appleby blasts out of the fairway bunker on the 6th hole during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:39pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Stuart Appleby tees off at the 8th hole during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Misssouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:39pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Stuart Appleby waits on the 8th tee during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:39pm

    ST. LOUIS, MO - SEPTEMBER 5: Robert Allenby blasts out of the fairway bunker on the 6th hole during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:38pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Robert Allenby tees off at the 8th hole during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:37pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Stuart Appleby waves to the gallery after a birdie attempt on the 6th hole during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round one

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:37pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Stuart Appleby checks yardage on the 7th hole during the rain delayed first round of the BMW Championship held at Bellerive Country Club on September 5, 2008 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Marc Feldman/Getty Images)

    BMW Championship - Round One

    Fri, 09/05/2008 - 2:26pm

    ST. LOUIS - SEPTEMBER 05: Billy Mayfair hits his first shot on the 16th hole after his tee shot during the weather-delayed first round of the BMW Championship on September 5, 2008 at Bellerive Country Club in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Jamie Squire/Getty Images)

    Oliver Kahn Farewell Party

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 6:12pm

    MUNICH, GERMANY - SEPTEMBER 02: (FREE FOR EDITORIAL USE - NO SALES) Retired footballer Oliver Kahn (R) receives a golf club from Bavarian Prime Minister Guenther Beckstein during the Oliver Kahn Farewell Gala at the German Theater tent September 2, 2008 in Munich, Germany. (Photo by Alexander Hassenstein/Getty Images for Farewell Oliver Kahn)

    Oliver Kahn Farewell Party

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 6:12pm

    MUNICH, GERMANY - SEPTEMBER 02: (FREE FOR EDITORIAL USE - NO SALES) Retired footballer Oliver Kahn (R) receives a golf club from Bavarian Prime Minister Guenther Beckstein during the Oliver Kahn Farewell Gala at the German Theater tent September 2, 2008 in Munich, Germany. (Photo by Alexander Hassenstein/Getty Images for Farewell Oliver Kahn)

    Oliver Kahn Farewell Gala

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 4:55pm

    MUNICH, GERMANY - SEPTEMBER 02: (FREE FOR EDITORIAL USE - NO SALES) Oliver Kahn receives a golf club from prime minister Guenther Beckstein during the Oliver Kahn Farewell Gala at the German Theater tent on September 2, 2008 in Munich, Germany. (Photo by Thomas Niedermueller/Getty Images for Farewell Oliver Kahn)

    2008 BMW Golf Championship kicks off in St. Louis

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 12:27pm

    PGA Tour pro Bubba Watson (C) poses for a photograph under the Gateway Arch with St. Louis Rams wide receiver Dane Looker (L) and punter Donnie Jones at the BMW Golf Championship Week kicks off in St. Louis on September 2, 2008. The BMW Championship, the third leg in the PGA Tour's playoffs for the FEDEX Cup will take place at Bellerive Golf Club in St. Louis on September 1-7. (UPI Photo/Bill Greenblatt) Photo via Newscom Photo via Newscom

    2008 BMW Golf Championship kicks off in St. Louis

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 11:12am

    PGA Tour pro Bubba Watson tries to drive a golf ball across the Mississippi River as the BMW Golf Championship Week kicks off in St. Louis on September 2, 2008. The BMW Championship, the third leg in the PGA Tour's playoffs for the FEDEX Cup will take place at Bellerive Golf Club in St. Louis on September 1-7. (UPI Photo/Bill Greenblatt) Photo via Newscom Photo via Newscom

    SkyCaddie PGA FourBall Championship - Regional Qualifier

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 5:40am

    MUSSELBURGH, UNITED KINGDOM - SEPTEMBER 02: Gary McFarlane competes in the Skycaddie PGA fourball Championship, Scottish region pre qualifier at Musselburgh Golf Club September 2, 2008 in Musselburgh, Scotland. (Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)

    SkyCaddie PGA FourBall Championship - Regional Qualifier

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 5:40am

    MUSSELBURGH, UNITED KINGDOM - SEPTEMBER 02: Craig Ronald competes in the Skycaddie PGA fourball Championship, Scottish region pre qualifier at Musselburgh Golf Club September 2, 2008 in Musselburgh, Scotland. (Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)

    SkyCaddie PGA FourBall Championship - Regional Qualifier

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 5:39am

    MUSSELBURGH, UNITED KINGDOM - SEPTEMBER 02: Mike King competes in the Skycaddie PGA fourball Championship, Scottish region pre qualifier at Musselburgh Golf Club September 2, 2008 in Musselburgh, Scotland. (Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)

    SkyCaddie PGA FourBall Championship - Regional Qualifier

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 5:39am

    MUSSELBURGH, UNITED KINGDOM - SEPTEMBER 02: Paul Wardell competes in the Skycaddie PGA fourball Championship, Scottish region pre qualifier at Musselburgh Golf Club September 2, 2008 in Musselburgh, Scotland. (Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)

    SkyCaddie PGA FourBall Championship - Regional Qualifier

    Tue, 09/02/2008 - 5:39am

    MUSSELBURGH, UNITED KINGDOM - SEPTEMBER 02: Steven Rettie competes in the Skycaddie PGA fourball Championship, Scottish region pre qualifier at Musselburgh Golf Club September 2, 2008 in Musselburgh, Scotland. (Photo by Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)

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